* and support your pet’s fetish for eating random items off the floor.
That’s right! I firmly believe in the cliche saying: A clean house is a sign of a boring life. Who wants to waste all that time?
Case in point: tonight I am a lady of leisure – no one’s home and I have a RARE evening home alone.
So what do I do? Clean the house….as quickly as possible! Here’s what works for me:
1. Swifter Dusters: Love ’em! I probably have to dust a little more frequently but it takes a fraction of the time.
2. Clorox Wipes: Quick cleans of the counters, bathroom, etc, are a pain in the ass without them. Bryan might tease me about my tendency to use a wipe over anything else…too bad.
3. Febreze: No one will know I didn’t clean everything from top to bottom if it smells better!!! Duh…
4. Rubber Pet Hair Mitt: This was a new addition tonight. Our dog loves to lay on our micro-suede coach. Our micro-suede coach loves to hold on to dog hair FOR DEAR LIFE. What is the mitt good at? Getting the hair off of the couch. That’s great, right? Sort of…what the mitt isn’t good at is holding on to said dog hair. Instead it throws it on the floor. The bonus? My dog loves to eat random things off the floor – including his own fur! Gross, you say? Absolutely! But we’ve resigned ourselves to the fact that this will ALWAYS occur. Oh well…less to sweep I guess.
So, now that I’m done with the cleaning I can get dressed for a crazy night on the town, right? Or for that girls’ night that I’ve been wanting to plan for months?
Hell no! I’ve closed myself off in the master suite with a large box of wine, my laptop, DVR and fresh nightlight bulbs (because yes, I’ll admit, I still sleep better with a nightlight). See you at sunrise…please bring some advil.
(p.s. Catch the further adventures of mama’s a mess home alone on Twitter @mamasamess. I’m sure there will be mass pinterest updates!)
(p.p.s. – If you’re reading this, I’m totally missing you.)