Just over a month ago I was having a rough time. I was feeling imbalanced and couldn’t figure out how to handle it all productively. There were a few bad days, and then a couple REALLY bad days. I was miserable and I was making everyone else miserable, too.
I posted something on Facebook. I know, I know. But isn’t it always a good idea to air your most personal melt-downs publicly? Not really, you say? Well…at my worst moment putting it out there actually wound up being a stroke of luck.
My Facebook friends are probably like anyone else’s. There’s a handful of people that I interact with all the time, another set that I was once active with but have drifted away from, a chunk of old childhood friends that are there more out of curiosity than anything else and then, if you’re like Bryan and I, a small group of people that I’ve only ever known on the internet because they’ve been active in the same groups as me or responded to something I’ve done online.
On my worst day, the first question came from one of my friends that fall into that last group. Star Tulle, whom I don’t know much about, stepped in and became my fairy kei unicorn, turning my entire day around in one fell swoop. After simply asking what was wrong, here’s what she had to say:
“Sara, here is something I’d like you to consider. Do ONE thing today that you fear or truly don’t want to do, or don’t want to take care of, or do something that you have been putting off. Even if you put into motion one first step of the process instead of thinking of how to bite off the whole thing at once, that one first step will be enough to get your brain wiring focused on anything else but what is getting you down right now. If you feel like you can’t take something like this on, then try to get some explosive exercise even if it is for a very short time. Take a vigorous walk and breathe very deeply, in and out, in and out. Make it a point to be very in the moment as you are taking those breaths. Stay super hydrated today with WATER. Avoid all persons TODAY who do NOT believe in you. DO THESE THINGS IF YOU CAN, just for today. When a person gets into a mindset that starts to feel like life is closing in, it can get so bleak and frightening. Who would not want to disconnect? It’s so overwhelming and scary. Rewire your brain today even if its temporary and force oxygen into yourself. Accomplish something ‘big’ even if its just part of a baby step to get you there. I care.”
I was taken aback first, because I never really expected that and then, because it was GREAT ADVICE! It helped re-frame my entire scope and was just the proverbial slap in the face I needed to snap out of that horrible place. That day didn’t wind up being full of adventure and accomplishment. It did, however, create enough of a spark to snowball into a new way of thinking. I’m still working on it (aren’t we all) but every little step makes a difference. A couple of weeks later I saw an individual who I was friends with solely from some minor internet exchanges and passed on that same advice. Hopefully it made a difference to them, too.
So, the moral of the story? Help can come from unexpected places if you’re open to it. Big changes can occur any time. And when you think things can’t get any worse, they don’t have to. They may actually get much, much better.
Some big things have been set into motion in our house. Watch out for what’s next.